Dear Friends of the Pub Quiz,
I once saw a comedian whose name you know perform a long routine about all the investments he and other dads had made in their sons’ love for and accomplishments in sports, only to see those sons become, say, NFL stars and then smile while sharing an inevitable message when first confronted with TV cameras: “Hi Mom!”
My Dad took me to see that comedian, one of maybe 100 times that he took my brother Oliver or me to see a show at the Kennedy Center, the performing arts arena whose opening my parents attended together. Even though this opening gala, with a new opera written for the occasion by Leonard Bernstein, also the conductor that evening, took place on September 8th, 1971, I still remember it. I suppose this is one of my earliest memories. My brother Oliver was only two months old.
I had such memories in mind when I called my Mom yesterday, for my father had passed away 15 years and a day ago, and the long walk that Jukie and I took from our south Davis home to the Pub for an early afternoon dinner gave me an opportunity to reminisce, and to mourn. On the phone, my mom reminded me that she and my Dad did not play all the manipulative games that other recently-divorced couples play, such as using the children as pawn in their game of cutthroat chess. Neither one of my parents had what evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins called The Selfish Gene.
We come to depend upon our parents and our best friends from childhood (such as my best friend Tito, who, speaking of March 2nd, was always eight days older than me, at least until he died suddenly on August 4th, 1993). And later, if we are lucky, they come to depend on us.
Some parents continue to bankroll their children, as I learned from an article in the March 2nd New York Times titled “The New 30-Something.” The subtitle asks this pertinent question: “Have you or haven’t you cut the financial cord with your family?” Although we enjoyed their visits, and the help they offered with the down-payment on our first Davis home in 1998, we largely have cut that financial cord, perhaps a necessity because of our choice to live so far away from the nearest parent.
But the need to belong, to be connected, to lift up others and, at times, to be uplifted ourselves never really goes away. We are grateful to our local friends in Davis. I think offhand about our friend “Uncle” Evan who brings us supplies or provides a ride when hospital visits interrupt our plans. I think of current and former members of our Davis City Council who greet me with a hug and words of affection. But despite our appreciation of such friends, one sometimes would seek also to adopt a readymade family.
That’s how I feel about the delightful Kalisky family. You probably know Trudy and Mo Kalisky from having visited their Upper Crust Baking Company booths at local farmers’ markets. Now they have a storefront at 634 G Street in the old Radio Shack building. Jukie and I visited there yesterday and were delighted to find both Trudy and Mo on location. Our conversations were repeatedly interrupted by Davisites dropping by to purchase examples of the hand-made and small-batch goodies. And I can see why. My kids just love the triple-chocolate and oatmeal cookies, while Kate hankers after the apple tarts. And the birdseed and multigrain whole wheat breads make any sandwich or toast seem like a gourmet experience. Now, more than ever, we have resolved to eat local bread.
As much as I love their baked confections, I am even more grateful to the love and friendship that the Kalisky clan has offered my family and me. These friends and I have voted together, dined together, visited photographic exhibits together, and even seen classical music performances in Sacramento together. I knew Trudy’s dad when he used to give away samples at the farmers market in the 1990s, Trudy and Mo have become like a beloved aunt and uncle, and their son Lorin (Happy Birthday Lorin!) and his family, and that of Lorin’s sister Gillian and her family, have become like our cousins.
With our own original families separated by distance (such as the distance between Davis and Chicago, or Davis and Washington DC), by time, and by death, Kate and my kids and I are grateful to adopt some bonus family members here in our home town. To know a Kalisky is to be richly rewarded, indeed.
Also, Hi Mom!
Tonight’s Pub Quiz will feature questions on some of the topics raised above, as well as on the following: sustainability, shareability, names that are unlikely to be spelled correctly, mountains, early leaders, the numbers in Mexico, final birthdays, power rankings, disingenuous ratings, cradles, non-vowels, friends in name only, famous books, conducting solutions, powerful women, fiery places, cardinal directions, people who may love sports, people who are neither Cher nor Madonna, reasonable safeguards, prison escapes, unfair disruptions, Nobel Prizes, polkas, unsound ovations, unusual superheroes, Hawaiian exports, big berries, beauties, even more than Bill Clinton, beer flavorings, and Shakespeare.
Poetry Night takes place on March 7th at 8 at the Natsoulas Gallery. Join us to see Joshua McKinney and Randy White astound us with new work. Also, take a siesta if you have to, but plan to join us at the Pub tonight at 7!
Your Quizmaster
https://www.yourquizmaster.com
http://www.facebook.com/yourquizmaster
yourquizmaster@gmail.com
Here are three questions from last week’s quiz:
- Science. The capybara, the largest living rodent in the world, is native to what continent?
- Books and Authors. Honored in the In-Memoriam segment at the Academy Awards last night, what playwright authored the plays Barefoot in the Park and The Odd Couple?
- Sports. Johnny Bench, Yogi Berra, and Carlton Fisk all played what position on their baseball teams?
P.S. “A happy family is but an earlier heaven.” George Bernard Shaw